I promise I didn’t forget how to write 🙂 Sometimes, nothing comes to me, and I’m totally okay with that. I don’t feel any pressure to write, it’s just something that I enjoy doing when thoughts come to me. I definitely have some neat things to share tonight, so it was the perfect time to bust out the blog.
This won’t be long, but I hope it will be an encouragement all the same! To give a little backstory, I started my last year of grad school two weeks ago (only thirteen weeks left!!!) and if you have ever read anything I have written before, you may know that grad school is not my favorite place on earth. But that’s okay too… I’ve come to realize that I don’t actually have to like it. I need to be thankful for it because God provided it, but still not my fave. Anyway, I am a speech path student and I start seeing clients tomorrow. Funny thing is, I have had clinic experiences before and have had my own caseload before, but I am nervous out of my mind about this one! I don’t know if it’s the variety of clients that I have, or the new school/supervisors, or what, but I am just plain old, pit-in-the-stomach nervous.
Anyway, I was driving back to school tonight, singing along to a hodgepodge of worship music, but really not getting into it. I was trying to pay attention to what I was singing and I may have prayed a little for help about clinic, but my nerves were getting the best of me. When we (and by we, I mean definitely me) focus on our emotions and feelings more than the solid, head knowledge of what we know to be true, we often fight those feelings of failure, fear, worthlessness, etc. That is called taking matters into your own hands. And funny thing is, our hands aren’t often equipped to deal with such difficult things in life. But God’s are.
I got back to my little studio and while I was putting my stuff away and cleaning, I was texting some family and friends, asking for prayer. Prayer for overwhelming peace, wisdom in how to treat my clients, and good guidance from supervisors in the process. Right after I had finished texting, one of my good friends also messaged me. We hadn’t talked in a few days so I thought it was nice to hear from her! Her text read “What can I pray about for you tonight?”
A simple text and I broke down in tears. This, friends, (especially to me) is proof of God’s faithfulness…even if it was in such a little thing. He listened to the cry of my aching and fearful heart and sent one more prayer warrior along…one who was completely in the dark about how I was feeling at the moment.
God sees us right where we are. He loves us. He is a faithful Father and just delights in giving us grace upon grace upon grace.
I was reminded tonight that He always cares. It doesn’t matter how small or seemingly insignificant. He cares. This reminder for myself tonight also brought my mind to a passage in Scripture. Genesis 16. You’ll have to read the chapter for yourself because I’m not going to type it all out, but in short, an Egyptian woman named Hagar was experiencing some major woes of her own. She was used and treated unfairly and ended up in a far-from-comfortable situation. I’m sure she had the pit in her stomach as well. I’ll end with her revelation about God (so similar to my own tonight), but I encourage you to read the full story to see the entirety of God’s blessing, keeping in mind His faithfulness. He is truly good.
Gnight, friends ❤
“So she called the name of the LORD who spoke to her, ‘You are a God of seeing,’ for she said, ‘Truly here I have seen Him who looks after me.'” {Genesis 16:13}
Love Sees You 